


Keep Him Alive

by junipersand



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: After the battle of the lake, Everyone has their own mini arc, Other, What if BadboyHalo was a bit more aggressive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:07:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26912647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/junipersand/pseuds/junipersand
Summary: "Keep BadBoyHalo alive, Dream." Tommy spat blood from his mouth and stared at his reflection from the lake's waters. Dream agreed amiably and began to hunt down the brunet in the forest. The teen turned to the darker parts of the forest and glanced at the warm lights from his uncovered base, now exposed from the fire of war.Dream drowned trying to escape BadBoyHalo... maybe it had been a bad idea after all.
Comments: 17
Kudos: 195





	Keep Him Alive

“Dream, make sure to keep Badboyhalo alive.” Tommy spat blood by the lake. He wiped the edge of his mouth with the back of his palm as Niki gathered the remains of netherite armour, then stashing them in an ender chest that used to belong to Sapnap. “We can’t afford him to spawn back at his base.”

If it were yesterday, nobody would believe Tommy would be the one that gave Techno and Dream orders. A legendary warrior and the final descendant of the elves—obeying orders from a mere human teenager? The world must be ending, yet it happened and the sky hasn’t collapsed.

From the forest, Dream’s voice called: “Sure, I’d glad to.”

They weren’t sure if he was ecstatic to be the one in control of his former mentor’s fate, or he was relieved that he needn’t stain his hands with more of his friend’s blood. They’ve killed too many—Skeppy, Sapnap, and Antfrost—all of whom were their dear friends that were misguided in the war’s happenings. Sure, they would respawn and come back to life, but the terrible price of resurrection was no light joke.

Tommy was sure that none of them would want to experience death again. For now, they would be safe. As long as they kept Bad away from an ender chest (he’d already broken Sapnap’s after Niki finished her scavenge), the disk would be safe and no harm would come to either side.

“That was,” Niki said breathlessly, holding an enchanted netherite sword in her hands, “ _amazing_ , Tommy. You were breath taking.” It was the first time that she came to own such a weapon. She was never a fighter, but for Pogtopia, she needed to learn.

The blond teen tensed, blood rushing to his face. It was quickly diminished, as he flailed his arms around his face to hide his blush. “OF COURSE I WAS. DID YOU SEE HOW I KILLED SKEPPY WITH NOTHING BUT A PICKAXE?” he boasted, holding out a worn-down iron pickaxe for exaggeration. Punz snorted and waved air away. “I am the best player in this SMP! Dream and Techno fear the name Tommyinnit!”

From the back, Techno yawned as he scratched the back of his head. “I ain’t scared of no gremlin like you,” he scoffed, already shuffling back to base and to his bed. When he passed by Tommy, he smelled like fresh potatoes and blood, as if he were a farmer that was pulled from a hoe to wield a sword to trample the wicked orphans that trampled his potatoes.

Techno shrunk back to his massive underground potato farm and never came back up.

Tommy turned to Niki. He was calmer now, only a faint dust of pink dusting his cheeks. “Well,” he wondered aloud, “we just won a war, Niki. We won the Battle of the Lake.” His face soured. “Don’t tell Wilbur, please? I can’t tell him that I had a war in front of our super-secret base.”

Niki chuckled. She tucked strands behind her ear as she hid the sword in her inventory. “I won’t,” she promised. “I won’t say a word to anyone. This stays a secret.”

Tommy laughed with her. For the first time in months, ever since he was exiled, he let himself smile under the warm hue of the sun. It was beginning to set, just like the fire of the war that ended before it even began.

Then one single line blared in their vision that changed everything.

_Dream drowned trying to escape BadBoyHalo_

The green-eyed demon was nowhere to be seen.

As Tommy, Punz and Niki panicked, both unarmed and armourless, a pearl landed behind them, and an axe was swung once.

_Nihachu was slain by BadBoyHalo_

_TommyInnit was slain by BadBoyHalo_

_Punz was slain by BadBoyHalo_

When Techno scrambled up the ladders to find his comrades, there was nothing and no one there, only a blazing fire that set their belongings aflame.

* * *

“You killed Dream, Bad!” Skeppy blasted, welcoming his best friend back from their mansion. The group was anxiously waiting for their captured teammate, waiting for that cursed kill call to drop, but it never came. Instead, _he_ was the one that outlasted them all. “You fucking killed Dream! And the Bitch Boy and Niki. You’re amazing, dude!”

Bad returned Skeppy’s hug with a sigh. “Language,” he scolded, voice hoarse. “And I didn’t kill him. At least, not directly.”

Sapnap frowned, crossing his arms. His lips were pursed like he had something to say, but he didn’t. It was a first for him. He was the type of person to say what’s on his mind every given time. It didn’t matter if it was four in the morning and everyone else had a college essay to finish. He would barge into rooms and start handing out free existential crises to anyone he sees fit.

“Yeah, dude, what happened?” Skeppy quizzed, pulling away from the hug. His hoodie was soaked from hugging Bad. Bad was covered head to toe in water and dirt. “How’d you clutch that? You’re literally the worst at PvP.”

Bad glared at him as he removed his helmet. Two horns protruded from either side of his head. “That’s mean, Skeppy!” he complained, glaring at the chuckling gem nymph. The sapphire fragments on Skeppy’s cheeks twinkled as response to his amusement. “Oh my goodness, I need to sit down.”

He removed his armour onto an armour stand and took a long, cold shower. Antfrost was pounding at the door, complaining that he’s using all of their cold water while Skeppy’s using all of their hot water. For beings who weren’t even prone to getting dirty, they sure were generous to themselves when it came to baths and facials.

Bad yawned, poking at the marshmallow in his cocoa. “I couldn’t save your stuff. I’m sorry,” he said to the group at the dining table, who were all waiting for news. The crowd collectively groaned and cussed, cursing the blond human’s name in a million different languages and insults. “But, on the other hand, I got this.”

From his inventory, he produced a sword. It was enchanted netherite, just like theirs.

“A sword?” Skeppy asked. “Who does it belong to?”

Bad’s face turned grim. “It’s Dream’s.” He looked to his cocoa when everyone turned to him. “I was in a hurry. I didn’t have time to pick up Dream’s stuff from the trap. Techno was nearby and I can’t risk taking him in a fight.”

“What trap?” Sapnap demanded. “That lava trap like last time? Dream fell for it once, he’s not going to get fooled again.”

 _Lava trap?_ Skeppy blinked. When did that happen? If Bad had anything to do with it, he didn’t know. Today was the first time that he’s heard of Bad killing Dream, ever. If something as large as Bad being the cause of Dream’s ultimate defeat flew over his head, he would literally shave his own hair.

“Actually, I just trapped him in obsidian,” Bad muttered. “I made sure Dream would be the one that killed Sapnap. I enchanted Sapnap’s helmet with max protection, thorns and unbreaking, but it wouldn’t have aqua infinity or respiration. I also made sure to make Dream leave his netherite pickaxe so he couldn’t get out. He couldn’t pearl either because he was trapped entirely.”

Trapping Dream in obsidian. The idea itself sounded almost absurd. If it was anyone else like Tommy or Wilbur or George or maybe Techno (they were sure Techno would scream and bust his way out with his bare hands if he had to), but Dream?

Absolutely not.

Sapnap glowered, still ticked off by the fact he lost to Tommyinnit. “What did my armour had anything to do with your plan?”

“It does,” Bad said nonchalantly. “Dream has a habit of choosing better armour during fights. He didn’t think that he would be near water during the war. His original armour was Protection III at best, and without Thorns.”

“And what about those three? How did you kill them?”

“I pearled and took them down while they were still low. Niki’s hunger wouldn’t be enough to regen after running from spawn. I took all of Tommy’s stuff so he couldn’t have eaten after taking more damage. Punz’s armour and gear were weaker than mine because I made sure of it.”

“Dude,” Antfrost breathed. He knew that Bad was a smart guy, but he didn’t expect him to outsmart everyone. Sure, he was the one that coordinated the group during Dream’s manhunt, and thanks to him, they did win by technicality – but this was real life. This was a real war where sacrifices must be made.

Bad nodded. “I gave it some thought just in case.”

Some thought?

Oh, yeah, Bad was a demon. A weak demon, sure, but a demon nonetheless. Demons were known for destruction and chaos. This happened to fall right into Bad’s nature – manipulating people’s minds. Even if he was a crap fighter and average at almost everything, he made up for his underlying intelligence.

If Ant didn’t participate in that manhunt with Bad, he never would have believed that Bad would be the cause of Dream’s death.

“Now they’re going to get revenge,” Skeppy murmured. “And Bad’s the only one with armour. We’re screwed. They still have Technoblade on their side.”

Bad nodded. “I’ve thought of that as well,” he agreed. “But before I left, I broke their bed.” He took a sip from his cocoa. “And I destroyed their ender chest. They’re still banished from Manburg. So even if Eret tries to help them, he can’t get them all out all by himself.”

The nymph snorted. The gems on his cheeks sparkled. “They still have Techno.” His face was eerily calm, unlike how he would react when the littlest bit of inconveniences happened.

Out of four of them, Skeppy and Bad were very much not human. They were from the Idots SMP, which was one of the furthest nations from here. Ant isn’t sure how the rest of the residents are like in their world, but if they had half of Bad’s cunningness or half of Skeppy’s brute force and skill, the Dream SMP would be as good as dead. Perhaps they knew magic like how Bad did. Perhaps they knew how to make the best axes with diamonds and netherite.

He was glad that they were on their side.

“Let him come.” Bad’s voice turned dark. “I have a plan for everything.”

* * *

“VURB!” Zelk screeched, his voice cracking. “DID YOU DO THIS?” He held out an ugly Christmas sweater, which was recognized to be his signature go-to clothes. It was shredded to utter pieces, with the sleeves falling off and the collar splayed beyond recognition. He shoved the disembowelled clothing in the demimonster’s face, almost smothering him.

The demimonster’s nose wrinkled. “Oh, it’s not me,” he defended himself. “Why would I go for your sweater? I’d rather suck on Finn’s toes.”

Zelk shuddered and recoiled. “I’ll trust you just this once.” Pushing the sweater into a ball, he chanted a quick spell that reversed the sweater’s destruction. He breathed a sigh of relief when his favourite sweater was black to normal. “Oh, thank goodness.”

“Maybe it’s Skeppy,” Vurb muttered. “He still hasn’t gotten back to you after you told him to prank call Astelic. I think she actually looked for Skeppy’s cousin. He doesn’t even have one. Water queens are scarily resourceful.”

“He’s at Dream’s SMP. If he teleported back, I would have known about it.”

“Oh, then it’s Mega.”

“He’s been sleeping since last year.”

“Spifey.”

“He’s also still sleeping.”

“Finn.”

“He’s somewhere in the spirit realm restoring peace between the yin and yang faction.”

“Astelic.”

“If she did, I’d forgive her because she’s scary. Also, she’s busy with diplomats in her underwater palace.”

“Harvey.”

“He’s off saving another country that summoned him. Are you just giving me the names of who lives in this SMP?”

“Maybe. Toes. Tubbo.”

“He lives in Dream’s SMP. Have you not been listening to me at all? Can you take this seriously for once? You and I are the only ones still here and I know these marks are recent because—”

“No, I mean _Tubbo_.” Vurb pointed past Zelk’s shoulder and straight to the window outside.

By the very borders of their nation was a skinny brown horse, and a teen riding atop the steed. His blue eyes caught their figures in Vurb’s house, dismounted, and approached them.

* * *

“ _Badbdoyhalo_ killed me?” Tommy gaped, pulling at his hair as he followed Dream through spawn. Niki and Punz trailed behind him, weary and shooting worried glances around them. “What the FUCK?”

Dream shot him a look. Tommy could only assume that it wasn’t good because he didn’t know what he looked like. That stupid mask has yet to come off his face and he wondered if there were tan lines around the man’s cheeks.

“This is why you don’t underestimate anyone.” Dream turned to the front and continued forging through. Without his armour, shield and axe, he looked normal. He wore a white shirt and military pants and laced boots just like everyone else. His pointed ears stuck from his blond curls, which was the only proof of his elfish heritage.

“Yeah,” Tommy agreed. “But it’s Badboyhalo. He uses muffins as insults.”

Dream was silent for a long time. He helped Tommy up from the spawn walls and they helped Niki and Punz up. There wasn’t anyone around because nobody knew about their spawns being reset. By logic, Dream and Punz shouldn’t have spawned with them and they should have wounded back at their original base, but it seemed their beds were also destroyed conveniently.

It didn’t take a genius to figure out who broke Punz’s spawn point, though.

“You know,” Dream spoke up, pushing a branch from his face.

Tommy gritted his teeth. “Know what?” he demanded, voice hoarse. He was still tired even after respawning – the battle left him weary and exhausted. Being killed straight after didn’t help matters. “How you’re a Bitch Boy and a pissbaby?”

Dream didn’t laugh. “Bad was my mentor.” Tommy shut up. “When I ran from my home when I was a child, Bad found me in the woods and practically raised me. He taught me how to fight even if he didn’t know how to himself.”

“A child?” Niki asked, surprised. “But you’re—”

Dream swatted another branch aside. They ventured forward and their hunger was running low. They needed to get back to base soon and find some food before the mobs get to them. “An elf, I know.” He pursed his lips like he had something more to say but stopped himself. “That was a few decades ago. Before any of you were even born.”

“Damn, you’re a boomer.” Tommy ignored Punz and Niki’s aghast stares. “So what? All we’ve got to do is shove a sword in his face and he’ll have nowhere to go. Easy. All I need to do is start stabbing shit.”

“It’s not that simple,” Punz spoke up. “Some things are too complicated to explain. Now that we’re Skeppy’s enemies—the whole Idots will be on us. You should know, Tommy. You’ve met them before.”

“They’re not dangerous.”

“They are,” Punz insisted.

“They all are,” Dream agreed. “Astelic, the queen of the northern sea. Finn, the guardian of the spiritual realm. Skeppy, a pure gem nymph that was born with paladin magic.”

Niki continued: “TapL, a SS-rank two-faced spirit respected by many countries. Vurb, a demimonster that came from hell itself.”

Punz chorused, “Zelk, a forest nymph and guardian of all animals. Mega, a nymph of the Underworld river Acheron. Spifey, the last necromancer from the Weremen.”

“They’re all dangerous,” Dream concluded. “They just choose not to be. They’re not like us. They’re not like humans.”

For the first time, Tommy listened. He remembered the names of the people he’s been told. Because some day he might meet his end, and the one who would bring it could have a name on that list. They knew those names because they were dangerous. Anyone who survived long enough would begin to remember the faces and names of the ones who hold most power. It was survival instinct.

A powerful continent that chooses to be peaceful. A group with power and influence but they choose to be harmless. If one— _one_ of them made a decision to join either side of their war, there would be no competition. In a nation filled with humans who can’t use magic, it would be a single-sided massacre.

“And where’s BadBoyHalo on that list?” Tommy noted. He didn’t hear the muffin-lover’s name anywhere.

Punz, Dream and Niki looked to each other.

“He’s a demon,” Dream could only say. “To him, our wars are playdates.”

* * *

Zelk’s eye twitched. He wasn’t sure if he heard the human right. “Do you mind repeating what you just said?” he asked, voice strung high and tense. “I’m sorry, but _what_?”

Tubbo had his arms crossed behind his back, his head bowed and gaze fixed to the floor. His boots were an interesting shade of brown. In front of him were two supernaturals: Zelk and Vurb, who were dumbstruck by the request they’ve received from a mere human.

Facing two infamous legends, Tubbo could only cross his fingers and hope for the best. He himself knows that his wish was outlandish and he would be lucky to walk away alive with his limbs intact. That is, if they decide to not strike him where he stood. Sick bile rose in his mouth. His stomach churned like butter and paste.

“This is an _interesting_ conversation we’re having,” Vurb admitted, crossing his arms. “But it’s a good change of pace.”

Zelk glared at him. “Vurb, don’t you dare.”

Vurb turned to Tubbo, ignoring his friend completely. “Hey, kid.” He put his hand on Tubbo’s shoulder. “You want us to stop Skeppy and Bad from killing Tommy?” Tubbo shot towards him, eyes wide with a glimmer of hope and shock.

Zelk sighed in exasperation, but he shook his head and ruffled Tubbo’s hair. His hand was calloused and cold. Tubbo heard a hum of magic when he touched his scalp. When Zelk lifted his hand from his hair, strands struck out in wild directions, curling and swirling in the presence of magic.

“We’ll do our best, Tubbo.” Zelk glowered at Vurb. “But don’t expect too much. He can still respawn after death. The best we could do is try to convince Zak and Bad that it’s not worth their time, which is going to give me a colossal headache.”

Tubbo’s gloomy expression dissolved instantly, replaced by joy and disbelief. “You… you really mean it?” He clenched the hem of his Manburg suit, dirtied and torn from his journey. “You’ll really help me?”

“Only because you’re not TommyInnit,” Vurb grumbled. Zelk elbowed him in his gut, forcing him to tell the truth. Vurb doubled over and held his stomach in pain. “Ugh. And I need to get back at Skeppy for that prank call.”

Tubbo didn’t know how to respond. The adults always had personal matters that they didn’t tell Tommy or Tubbo. Dream always kept it positive and as family-friendly as possible whenever they were around, even if Tommy was anything but. Techno stopped brooding around his potatoes and chose to actually monitor them for once. They were the only things that could distract him from his farm. Wilbur was the only one that treated Tommy like an equal and made him vice president and Tubbo the secretary.

“Thank you.” Tubbo’s voice trembled. Relief washed over him, and the adrenaline finally gave away. He only now noticed that he was exhausted and shaking from hunger and thirst. His eyes stung from dry air and dust. His mouth was dryer than a dessert.

Zelk caught him just before he fell.

“Goodness kid, you’re in quite a pickle there,” Zelk said worriedly. “Do humans get magic-deficiency too? I could’ve sworn that humans can’t do magic.”

Tubbo had no idea what that was supposed to be, but he felt like it was coming from someone who was definitely not human and understood nothing about them. Humans can utilize magic, but only through a physical vessel. Swords, pickaxes, armour, axes… they just can’t _use_ it.

“He’s tired, Zelk. Not magic-sick or whatever you call your fancy knockout sessions.” Vurb scratched the back of his head. “Just give him some food, water and some rest. At least that’s what Harv told me. He has more experience with humans than the both of us.” He crinkled his nose. “Do humans like raw meat?”

Zelk and Vurb were great hosts, even if their house was anything but. Nothing was in order, books and artifacts were scattered across the floor like the results of an afterparty. The smell of cooked chicken wafted through the air as Zelk tried to replicate the best foods that humans could ingest. (Though, one time, he accidentally added a vial of potion to the meat and it turned purple.) Vurb gave him a fur blanket and a goblet of water. The goblet was crafted from gold and embedded with jewels. It felt too expensive and valuable for Tubbo to touch, but he noticed there were a dozen others gathering dust or used as quill ink holders.

Somehow, the fur blanket around his shoulders felt like it was something that an old king would wear as robes. Tubbo decided not to think about it. He also elected to ignore the various crowns, tiaras, and diadems sitting in the corner of the room, covered with a sheet and never to see the light of day. Some things were not meant to be understood by the human mind.

“I don’t know if this is top-notch, but it’s the best I can do.” Zelk removed the fire from the logs with a swish of his finger. The flames fizzled out like a candle flame. He cooled the food down and handed the entire tray to Tubbo. The meat was warm but the tray was room temperature.

Tubbo took the tray, staring at the cooked chicken. “Is this really alright?” he asked. He hadn’t had such a meal for ages since the first war started. Meat was something that was considered luxury.

Zelk shrugged. “You tell me. We don’t have or use utensils, so this’ll have to make do. Sorry about that.”

Tubbo shook his head. “No, no. It’s fine.” He let the fur blanket drop past his shoulders as he grabbed for a chicken leg. Tearing it off almost desperately, he bit into the golden-brown meat and tore it into his mouth. It was soft and still steaming – the best chicken he’s ever had in his life. There was no special flavouring, but it tasted better than all the hundreds of meals he’d had.

He wolfed down the rest of the chicken, leaving not one bit of meat behind. When he ate the final bite of chicken breast, he set the bones down and sighed in satisfaction.

“I’m assuming that was good.” Zelk clapped his hand once, and the tray disappeared along with the bones. “I’m glad you like it. I used to be a chef for a royal family, you know. It’s nice to know that I still have that skill.”

“Watch. He’s going to die from food poisoning,” Vurb jabbed.

Zelk glared. “Shut up.”

Tubbo washed his hands and face in a sink nearby. He splashed cold water onto his face, wiping dirt, grime and sweat from his cheeks. Stomach full, rested and safe, he finally let his thoughts flow in.

Tears flowed down his cheeks instead.

Why was he here? Why did he have the privilege to have cooked chicken, and not his friends? How could he feel safe and satisfied while his family was out there, suffering and banished from their own home? Techno was a solution to their famine and manpower troubles, but they weren’t out of the woods just yet.

They were all suffering and starving and scared, and Tubbo was away from his own nation, eating cooked chicken and drinking water from gold goblets and covered in a priceless fur coat.

Even if Schlatt was the one that tore their home apart, Tubbo felt like _he_ was the traitor to his family. How dare he enjoy himself whilst everyone else struggled to find light in the morning? Why wasn’t he by Tommy’s side, fighting Schlatt’s tyranny side-by-side? Instead, he was Schlatt’s fucking _secretary_. A slave to an anarchic empire that was built upon the suffering of its founders.

Tubbo clenched the sides of the sink. He crumpled and buried his face in his hands, his sobs accompanied by running water.

* * *

“Tommy?” Wilbur demanded, appalled. “Tommy, talk to me.”

Strewn across the floor were sets of netherite armour and swords, all enchanted and fixed with Mending. Tommy had his head hung and his fingers laced behind his back, waiting for a scolding that would soon come.

“Tommy,” Wilbur repeated, picking up a helmet from the pile. It was a good helmet with all-rounder enchantments too. It was difficult to get in this nation, no matter who you were. It didn’t matter if you were Dream or Technoblade or Karl Jacobs. Netherite gear was rare and for a right reason. “Where did you get these?”

Tommy mumbled something incoherently.

Wilbur groaned. “Tommy, speak louder to your president. I ex—”

“He won us a war.”

The voice came from Techno’s farm, and it wasn’t Techno’s voice.

Wilbur tensed, freezing up as he shot towards the farm’s entrance. Dread pricked at his spine. “ _You_ ,” he spat with venom in his voice. “Why are you here, in _Pogtopia_?”

Dream shrugged indifferently. “I’m on your side.” Punz walked out behind him and gave Wilbur another heart attack. “And so is he. Techno bribed him but now he’s stuck with us.”

Wilbur frowned, ready to take caution steps back and run. Dream was wearing no armour, just his clothes, and so was Punz.

“What do you mean?” Wilbur repeated. “Explain. Now.”

He was looking at Tommy, but the blond teenager seemed to have lost his sheen and rowdiness. Instead, his gaze remained stuck to the floor, finding his boots far more interesting than any of his reality. The sight of it churned Wilbur’s stomach – suddenly he wasn’t worried about the war anymore. He was worried about TommyInnit; the child who claimed to be older than he was and a leader of an entire revolution. Fires were bound to be snuffed out one day but he didn’t expect Tommy to lose his so soon.

When Tommy kept his mouth shut, Punz was the one that filled Wilbur in. The more he listened and understood, the darker his expression became. His chest tightened when he heard that a new nation has risen in his brief absence. He dug his nails into his skin when Punz mentioned the final outcome of the war. There was no victor nor loser—both sides suffered the same loss.

“BadBoyHalo?” he repeated, the name foreign to his tongue. He’s only met the man once, and it was on a casual mention and exchange. He didn’t even know why he was here to begin with. The Dream SMP was no place to be finding peace or frolicking in flowers. Why Dream let someone like him on here, it was still a mystery. “Like, Skeppy’s pastry boyfriend BadBoyHalo?”

“I’m pretty sure they’re not dating-dating,” Punz said. “But yes. BadBoyHalo killed us all.” He glanced at the pile of gear on the ground. “We managed to salvage these before it happened. I can’t say the same for the rest of our own.”

Wilbur took note of Dream, Tommy and Punz’s defenceless state.

“I thought netherite can’t be burned.”

“They can’t,” Dream fumed. “Bad either took them for himself or he made the trip to let them despawn. I doubt he’s found a desert so he can’t throw them in a cactus.”

“Or he could’ve just taken our stuff for his little faction,” Techno supplied monotonously. “It’s a fair trade and we got the better end. Other than Skeppy, the others aren’t much of a real threat. All we gotta do is outsmart Bad’s outsmarting, win these, and I could go back to farming my potatoes.”

Dream glanced at Techno. He made it sound so easy. Even if the potato furry didn’t, Dream knew they were facing up with something much scarier than a raid. They were risking war that would no longer be fought with shields and axes. It would all come down to smarts and wits. Dream was abnormally gifted in smarts, but Bad’s chaotic mindset proved to emerge victorious in the long run. It was always the unsuspecting tasks that led to his ultimate win.

“If we attack them before they make a full plan,” Dream decided, “then we’ll stand a chance.”

As it turns out, nobody did.

* * *

“BADBOYHALO!” Quackity hollered, catching the demon by the sheeps. “I NEED TO SPEAK TO YOU!”

Bad yelped, his shears just barely missing the sheep’s exposed skin. The sheep bleated and wriggled free of Bad’s gentle hold and skidded off to join his kind. Sheared blue wool was littered around the floor, freshly sheared from the animal.

“Why, hello there, Quackity,” Bad greeted with a hint of irritation in his voice. He turned to the pale-skinned human as he gathered wool from the ground. “Is there anything you need?”

The sheep was still half-sheared, so it walked around with half of its body buck naked and the other half still fluffy with cyan wool. When Bad tried to approach it, it mewled and sprinted from him, in fear of the slip-up that happened only seconds ago.

Quackity didn’t bother to hide his laughter. “Man! A half-naked sheep. Guess we’re really seeing everything this fine year.” He leaned on the fences, his fake plastic wig hanging past his shoulders as he winked at the brunet. “So, how’s it going?”

Bad straightened himself and brushed wool from his jacket. Neither of them were wearing armour – it was basic etiquette for the people in the SMP and Manburg. They would fight with words, not violence. “What do you want to talk about, Quackity?” He sighed. “Do you need relationship advice for your marriage?”

Quackity’s pale face turned beet red, like a rash spreading from his cheeks and down to his neck. He began to splutter and trip over his words. “What? No!” he spat. “I’m here to talk about your allegiance to Schlatt! You know, our elected president?”

“ _Your_ elected president,” Bad corrected him. “I am not part of Manburg.”

“Yes, yes. You’re very smart, I know.” Quackity coughed into his fist and regained his composure. Then, he waved his hooked finger at Bad, gesturing him to come closer for a secret. Bad narrowed his eyes, sceptical, reaching for his sword but went against it. He leaned forward and Quackity cupped his hands around his mouth for a whisper.

“I saw your doings, _Bad_ BoyHalo,” Quackity hummed. “And I think you would be a good addition to our team. Maybe you can be George’s personal secretary like how Tubbo is Schlatt’s. Think of all the power you could get. All the pranks you could do on Fundy!”

Bad lurched away from him. “Thank you… for the offer.” His voice was a mix of disbelief and disgust. “But I’d prefer to do things my way, and Manburg’s policies aren’t what I’m used to.”

“Think of all the power you could have! You killed _Dream_ and TommyInnit!” Quackity boomed. “Gold! Fame! Women! Gamer Girls!”

Bad shirked from Quackity. “I’m sorry, but my answer is still no. Unless you give me a really good offer, then I’ll consider it!”

He whirled to the fence gates that were the opposite of Quackity, pocketing his shears and blowing off wool strings.

A new voice said, “What about offering you complete control of Manburg and the SMP?”

Bad turned and so did Quackity. Standing by the obsidian flag of Manburg, arms crossed with a knowing smile on his face, was none other than the president himself, dressed in his finest business suit.

“And what do I have to give in exchange for all that power?”

“Simple.” Schlatt’s eyes gleamed darkly. Quackity may not have seen it, but Bad caught it as clear as night and day. “I want two of your friends from the Idots to join Manburg. Any two would be fine.”

Bad tilted his head, acting innocent and putting on a surprised look on his face. “Can they?” he asked. “I’d love to call my friends on, but are they allowed on the SMP in the first place?” There was a reason that the Dream SMP and Idots SMP never interacted before this. It was only because of Bad that Skeppy was allowed on these very lands.

_They feared their power._

Now, Schlatt was personally inviting two of the walking legends to his land. If Bad agreed, they would be nearly unstoppable and untouchable. Techno and Dream were skilled and powerful, but against magic and otherworldly beings, they wouldn’t stand a chance. They could stop their heads before they could raise their swords. They could wither and turn to dust before they could speak.

Schlatt was playing with fire. Very, very dangerous fire.

“I’ll see to it personally,” Schlatt promised him. “If you do so, I’ll give you an hour to make any reasonable decree you want. The world will be yours; just for an hour.”

If Bad happened to be Skeppy or anyone else, Schlatt wouldn’t be making such a daring move. Limitless power for an hour in exchange for two allies. He knew Bad was an unofficial member of Idots and the Dream SMP alike. Everybody did. Bad was always that side character sitting by a coffee table while everybody else went to war. He was the one that sipped cocoa with marshmallows while the world went to shit and the building burned around him.

“ _Nuntius accerso dolor_ ,” Bad murmured to no one but himself, “ _ruptor et fallaciarum_. _Excitet somno et exaudiet vocem meam_.”

For moments, nothing happened. Bad was standing there, seemingly talking to himself and staring into the abyss. Then the water by him began to bubble, boiling into a sickly shade of green and grey. Beside him, a magic circle emerged from the ground, spreading and spiralling to full bloom, coloured red and green. At once, human limbs forged through both anomalies, revealing their heads, shoulders, arms, then eventually their entire body.

They were very much not human.

“Mega, Harvey, this is Schlatt,” Bad introduced, gesturing to the lamb-horned president. “Schlatt, this is Mega and TapL. They will be the ones who are more than ecstatic to join you.”

TapL waved politely. His appearance was a human just like Bad, but he covered the upper part of his face with a green and green mask. Half of his exposed cheeks were tinted red and green each, like blush and glitter. Mega, on the other hand, scowled at Bad. His skin was ashen grey with tints of green and blue.

Schlatt took a step back. Clearly, he underestimated the power of the lands far from here. “And how am I sure they will pledge their loyalty to me only?”

“Oh, that’s simple!” Bad assured him. He brushed the last bits of blue wool from his hood. “You’ll just have to believe them.”

* * *

“I just got a message from Zelk that Harvey and Mega were called here by _you_ ,” Skeppy fumed, shaking Bad’s shoulders furiously. “What are you _doing_? Are you fucking insane?”

“Language!”

“We’re already fighting a war, Bad. Why are you pitting two of our friends against us? You do realize if they die, they lose all their memories, right? They’re not like us! They’re pure magic!”

“They won’t die,” Bad promised. “And who’s to say that Harvey and Mega won’t help us? Schlatt doesn’t know about our new faction. He only knows about the Idots.”

Skeppy blinked, releasing Bad’s shoulders in shock. He knew his friend was cunning and manipulative, but this was a full-scale operation against multiple factions at once. The Dream SMP, Manburg and Pogtopia. The Badlands were at a severe disadvantage with only four members, and two of which didn’t have proper training to begin with. Manburg had manpower (now having TapL and Mega on their side, maybe). Pogtopia had pure skill and leadership. And BadLands?

It was only a matter of time that they were wiped out. No matter how smart Bad was or how skilled Skeppy could be, they couldn’t fight the world.

“What are you planning, Bad?” Skeppy’s voice was eerily calm.

Bad smiled – like the most innocent of smiles that could be seen on his face whenever someone complimented his ducky onesie or said they enjoyed his baked muffins. Only now it dripped poison that rarely came to light.

“My first decree as the temporary president of Manburg and the SMP,” Bad declared, “is that all factions, nations and the Idots would partake in a battle for power.” He laced his fingers together, pressing his palms as if he were praying. “The losers would submit to the winner until another re-election is held. Not by democracy, but by a display of power.”

Oh.

_Oh._

Skeppy remembered a conversation they had while they were building the foundation of their base. _We’re going for world domination!_ Bad had said joyfully, holding a bucket of salmon he caught from the river nearby. Skeppy yawned and passed it off as one of his jokes, but it wasn’t one to begin with.

This had been Bad’s plan since the very beginning.

  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact! In this AU, Bad has the ability to replicate voices. So at the start of the story, when Dream calls, "I'd be glad to" to Tommy, it was actually Bad speaking. Dream couldn't speak because well - he's drowning in an obsidian trap without a pickaxe or ender pearls or golden apples. He's eternally screwed.
> 
> Also, Bad was speaking Latin. Here's the translation:  
>  _I summon the messenger of pain, and the breaker of deceit. Awake from your slumber, and heed my call._


End file.
